Thursday, July 29, 2010

Letting Too Much Out - Defeating Google

I used to think Google is the scariest thing in the world. Caues it knows so much about me. I have no prestige or integrity in front of the Google gods. Every website, every search, every question I’ve put on there, including “How to clean puke off of electrical equipments?”. Some questions you cant ask out loud, not just the dirty filth but also stuff you're too embarrassed to ask - like who the fuck is the CM for MP anyway or why is West Bengal called West Bengal, even though its in the east and that it confuses me. Sometimes I think how badly this Google guy on the other side would be judging me without knowing me. In case, I ever meet Brin and Paige, I’m just gonna give them the high eyes, the ones Larry David gives.

But yesterday I realized, Nope. They aren’t the scariest ones really. You know who knows most about you and who you should really be scared of? Your local chemist guy. That’s right. Jesus Christ, the shit he knows. My food habits. Bowel Movements. Fact that you once bought odomos. Period cycles. sex lives. Ugly ulcer details. How you sometimes take less medicine cause you don't have enough money. How you come in the ugly black shorts in the morning for some emergency (unwaxed legs and shorts much like bermuda from primary school days). For fuck's sake. I never feel like a pretty girl in front of the chemist guy, he knows a little too much about me for my own good sake.


Subhajit said...

So true...

Vimal said...

i was once in the reception area of google's office, and they had a huge screen which showed the latest things people were searching for around the world. u wont believe the weird nonsense people want to know about "does maria sharapova trim her nostril hair" "why does my rottweiler's 2 day old pup look so much like my neighbour" "are eskimo(e?)s people too?"

Saurav Arya said...

Diversify ur choice of search engines and chemists! Order your medicines online,maintain stock and save money,time and your image!

Btw, I read somewhere that girls dont want advices/solutions from guys they just want to be sympathized.

Kim said...

wow!! that's so true :D

Eternally Stupidified said...

just 1 question ??
what made you realise it ??

sunshine said...

This is absolutely funny Nainy and yes the local chemist guy knows a little too much about a person, which is good for a world where no one seems to know no one!

Ire said...

A funny but insightful post. Beware of the Chemist guy!

Prakhar Deogirikar said...

You should really think seriously about adding a share button on your blog.

Hate that i can't share it directly from here!

Unknown said...

@ Subhajit


@ Vimal

Love the information and now you've gotten me hooked on this on! :/ I want to be google. I guess I'm the worst type of gossip person.

@ Arya

On the second point, I never really thought of it that way, BUT... true that!

@ Joyous


@ Eternally Stupified

It's embarrassing, or I would have shared :( Uggh, dont remind me.

@ Sunshine

You have a way of saying things :) Lights up my day :)

@ Nikita

Thats right! :p

@ PD

Done! :)

kamaltriloksingh said...

I never really realized how with how much of simplicity you say the strangest of things.
There is real charm and in some ways authenticity in the way you write about your experiences.


Sonia said... of your funniest wittiest awesomest posts. You should make a short film with this idea, seriously.

Namz said...

I think im reading your blog after ages but this was so true... So factual and so true... Very interesting!

Namz said...

I think im reading your blog after ages but this was so true... So factual and so true... Very interesting!